October 16th, 1951

Dumbledore—

邓布利多——

My memory might be a bit weak, but I believe the exact phrase might have been something more like“smug，supercilious, INFURIATING bastard, sanctimonious git with a bloody superiority complex, like to pretend you're so humble, you hypocrite, no I don't want any candy.”I wasn't even drunk.

或许我的记忆是有些浑浊了，但我清楚地记得我当时说的是“一个自以为是、盛气凌人、傲慢又令人窝火的杂种，故作谦虚、道貌岸然的伪君子。不，我才不想吃糖。”那时我可没有喝醉。

Then again, I'm the one locked in a room for the rest of his life, wandless, slowly going mad. Can my memory really be trusted? I suppose now you'll tell me that what I console myself with at night is false—that I never slid your hair through my hands, that I never seen Dark spells crackle down your wand and set your face alight. I suppose next you'll tell me that you don't scream in the back of your throat at climax. I suppose next you'll tell me that I never took you over that old oak coffee table when Aberforth was out.

又再强调一次，我是要被关在监狱里度过余生的，失去了魔杖，也正在慢慢发疯。我的记忆还能当真吗？你一定会告诉我那些在夜间里能安慰我的一切都是虚假的——我的手从未顺抚过你的发丝，也从未见过你的杖尖上迸射出黑魔法，光芒照亮过你的脸颊。紧接着，你又会否认你从未在**后失声尖叫，告诉我你也从未在阿不福思出门时被我摁在那张旧橡木咖啡桌上。

Go ahead. Mock me with Transfiguration texts, now that I can never do magic again. Look down your long nose at me. Who broke it, anyway, old friend? Someone else who attempted to empty out all the hot air you're full of?

继续吧，用你的变形术课本继续嘲笑我，我现在已经失去魔法了。从你那条长鼻子上往下打量着我吧，告诉我，是谁打折它的，我的老朋友？那些不想听你大谈无用空话的人？

注：

1.Look down your long nose有蔑视意，双关语。

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第4章 第三只猫头鹰